Why I Do NOT Love Valentine’s Day (An Almost Satire)
Last year for Valentine’s Day I wore black to mourn the loss of the true meaning of love (and also to mourn my happiness since I was single). This year, I will be visiting my boyfriend’s house and eating popcorn while forcing him to spend hours watching Hallmark movies with me. However, even though I am in a relationship I have a special part in my heart where I harbor my detestation of the popular love holiday. So here are some things about Valentine’s Day that I do NOT love:
1. All that free chocolate makes everyone fat and then the next couple of weeks everyone will be complaining about how fat they are
2. We are forced to consider our own perpetual loneliness if we are not in a relationship
3. True love has become an over-sized, over-priced Walmart teddy bear
4. It is my father’s birthday but everyone who is not immediate family is too busing buying into consumer culture to care
5. Flowers die and make a big mess and use water that could go to kids in Africa
6. Hallmark movies are addicting and are the cause of many sad, lonely people who realize no one who loves them
7. You should love your significant other every day NOT once a year when you remember that your Facebook status says that you are “in a relationship”
8. Love is the essence of transcending the material world, so stop celebrating it with more credit card debt
10. Saint Valentine was also the Saint of Plague and Disease (Food for thought).
So although the day now passed, just remember Valentine’s is another day of the year and you have every other day of the year to love and be loved (or mourn your loneliness).
-Stephanie Thompson, Head of Marketing